Jennifer

So, another fine month with my exercise. I am keeping this in mind because sometimes it is hard to see the goodness when there is no evident progress. But of course I know I am better for all the workouts. Even though I gained. Not muscle either and if it is, it is buried deeper…lol Blah! This is Now a new moment.

1- Winsor Pilates-Accelerated (50), elliptical (30)
2- elliptical (30), Get Ripped strength training (50)
3- elliptical (45), yoga (going to try something new- Hatha yoga), crunches: 4 x 25 = 100
4- Get Ripped (52), elliptical (30)
5- Brisk walk early this AM (58), Hatha yoga for beginners (42)
6- Elliptical (45)
7- Get Ripped (52), Pilates-Butt and Thigh (18)
8- Walking (90), Elliptical (30)
9- Get Ripped (52), walk (45)
10- Hard Body Yoga (60), walk (45)
11- Get Ripped (52), crunches 4×25, bowling (1 hour and it was EXERCISE…lol)
12- yoga (42), walking (40)
13- Interval walking (30), pilates (50), elliptical (30)
14- Get Ripped (52), walking (90)
15- Day off
16- pilates (18), Get Ripped (52), extra stretching
17- Hatha yoga (42), planning for a walk after supper…. (60)
18- Get Ripped(52), walking (45)
19- Day off
20- Get Ripped-no deltoids or fronts of shoulders (45ish)
21- Get Ripped-Upped the weight just a little, because I was not feeling a thing anymore. Kept some exercises the same though. (52)
22- Hatha yoga (42)
23- Get Ripped (52), pilates (18)
24- pilates (40), triceps (3×20), off for a bit of a walk…. just feel BLAH! -should perk me up…only 20 minutes
25- Get Ripped (no biceps), walking (120)
26- walking (95)
27- walking (45)
28- Get Ripped (52), walking (60)
29- Walking (70)…stopped to watch the geese on the river for 10 minutes..lol, yoga (45)
30-Get Ripped (52), walking(30)

I am away from Buddyslim for a few days and I will be studying and keeping up with the healthy balanced eating and exercise. All the best to you all. Take care of yourselves! When I come back my blog will be Thinking of creative, food-free ways to deal with stress. Oh yeh, we can come up with one heck of a fun list *hugs*

My blog did not post so this is the short. Sugar is my drug and I am staying completely clear of it. This substance serves no good purpose anyways other then changing my brain so that I feel more like a depressed monster instead of a well functioning person.

I am aiming for 50-30-20 (c-p-f) and really trying to eat plenty of protein rich foods - like eggs, egg whites, sardines, fish, legumes, veggies and yogurt. When I am feeling like my happy self again I will go back to a more vegetarian type diet. I still feel better with vegetarian, but I need to feel balanced again. So this is my medicine. Food in the right portions, at the right times and with the right intention. Feed the hunger!

I recommend once again - Optimum Nutrition for the Mind by Patrick Holford

http://www.google.ca/search?hl=en&q=Optimal+Nutrition+for++the+mind&btnG=Google+Search&meta=

And thank you Shanna for this link…..

http://www.radiantrecovery.com/

It takes a little time to feel well again but a balanced diet seems ideal for me. For those who seem to constantly struggle ( I mean I know how to feel good, this is not my normal state) I highly recommend seeing a doctor or nutritionist who will test you for imbalances - chemical/nutrient excess and deficiencies. The thing is doctors often do not know and things go unrecognized and so much is unknown. Check on the book online. It is a shame for us to suffer unnecessarily. I am working to get myself back to the old me. Exercise, proper nutrition, the vitamins that are right for me, good sleep and ideal ways to deal with stress. NO SUGAR. Appetite is not completely back, but exercise will help because I know not eating properly will surely cause me to gain! Experience.

Early this AM a walk helped to clear my head a bit. Hope you are doing well. *hug*

- Lessons in really being Present with the people in your lives….rushed, but I hope the just is understood…..

So, no dieting this weekend. We almost ate food as a means of finding that common thread between us. Kind of seemed like we were new to each other. I know we are good. Out of all the things that work we found a difference. I understand it to be a common difference amongst men and woman and so I am calm and we are at peace. Communicating….

It is crazy to share this here, but it was so cool that so many old and new shared such warmth with me in the previous comments so I also feel the need to share with you that I am so lucky to have found someone who I share so much with. I mean we have different interests and do our own thing, but we also agree on so much. I guess it is not shocking that something had to make us butt heads finally. I mean we have similar desires for life, life plans, spirituality (though he is more closer to being an atheist and I someone who seeks spiritual enlightenment, he supports me so in all I desire), food (LOL)…… We get each other, yet perhaps better communication is needed sometimes. I guess certain things have been left unsaid and this does not make for good relations. SO THEY WERE SAID and this girl realized she has a lot more strength then she ever new. Well, it is one of those experiences that needed to be experienced. I really need to be more present! We so rarely get intense like this that it is shocking, strange and confusing as to know how to handle. I guess the moral of the story is that regular communication is so good. Plus when all is said and done there is not a weekend where food should be used as a tool for comfort. However, this weekend I almost think it was ok. Did I say that??? Well, it was cool to let go of the need to be on a diet and just BE. Besides my stomach told me I had eaten a little more then I should have. Not even a great deal, just a little overboard. Well, this is the life and it is my opportunity to dive into every new moment…. SO, here I go! Tomorrow I am going to respond to the lovely comments individually, but for now, I have somewhere I need to be. Please know that I am so thankful for all the support and kindness.

Have a great week! Thank you so much ladies. You are beaUtiful and you better know it *hugs*

OH YEH… back to a good diet again, with hopefully some good results! 

You know, good moods and bad moods can be very contagious on here. I do not want to infect anyone, but I also had NO ONE that I could talk to at this early hour. SO here my fingers go…..type, type, type……. I needed to just be here because after over a year of being here, it still is nice to feel like I have a little home. So the goodness we all can take from this is ………………. Appreciation for this site. I appreciate how it is always here for me to just be me. So often I only share bits of me. This is a little more then I would like on a healthy minded day, but c’est la vie! (I wrote this after I wrote the rest of this, but thought I would put it first.)

So I am actually writing here today as it seems like one of the worst days in a very long time and I feel so alone. I am reading in my text about reality and real is never experienced but rather what we interpret and experience instead are the basis for our lives . Well right now I am so depressed. My partner and I are on such different pages. I mean things are really not good. I have been depressed this week a little, but after last night I feel like I have completely shut down, I guess you could say my emotions have done just this. No blaming, but rather just feeling down. The strangest thing is happening. I do not want to eat. I find it difficult to put 4 tablespoons of food in me and chew each one. I just do not care. I made an herbal tea that I do not enjoy and am drinking it just because it is good for me. I feel like a robot, emotionless but still somewhat able to multi-task. So, I am going to keep on doing what it is I need to do, though eating might be difficult until I get out of this funk, and I am just going to get through it…. this is what people do right…. exist, walk through this life… Well no, I know this is not right, but this is how I feel at this moment. I will allow for it for awhile. If I were reading this I would share with a member here how important it is to take a moment and breath. Things are rarely as bad as they seem if you just take a moment of concentrated breathing and see or do something else. For ourselves! Well I will get there but right now I am just darn right in a funk. However, things do not seem as bleak since when I first signed in. Yay!

I have not ever had a day in my life where I just did not want to eat. It is like I am experiencing this all for the first time because I need to know what it feels like. Like I am researching it for a class? Could this be it? Yes, that is how I will look at it. I am bettering myself as a person. Ha! Well clearly it is just one of those times when I need to feel and go through this. I do not want to become sick so I will do what I can. Make myself eat little bits, take my vitamins, drink water and go for a walk later in the snow/rain. Whatever. I will make myself better. I am an Amazon and NOTHING will get me down for long. Haha…..

Hope everyone is having a great day, enjoying some good weather. Soon the snow will melt and the flowers will bless our senses. Going to see Phantom of the Opera tomorrow, which is my favorite (have seen it 2 times before) and this will be good I think. Another world in live performances, one that is never felt with TV I find….a time where I just tend to zone out. SO, unengaging! oh grief, a tangent…… done now. ttfn

I have to say first off, it is COLD here. Forget about the actual number, the wind is so nasty! Ok. Dealing with this. These reporters from one of the news stations comes up to me the other day and asks me if it is going to storm. I thought he was nuts. So my remark was basicaly whatever, whatever, all will be good. Well the joints are feeling it today. Burrr! The sun shows it’s face and thank goodness for this.

So, we have been eating out a lot, not such bad choices actually, but back to the basics this week. And the poem works. Most of the time just letting the cravings and wanting pass really works. But I thought of something else that worked for me today when I was just wanting for a moment. Over the weekend I heard a story about how there will not be enough food for many countries and this got me thinking about my consumption. How can I eat in such excess when others have none or so little? Clearly my days food does not affect a child elsewhere, but it did change how I was thinking. Not guilt. Just a realization of what I need, what is good for me and what is just shear habit, poor habits.

So, I am thinking food combining is not so bad when I do it most of the time and still allow for some treat type foods. I am eating moderately and exercising moderately as well. I call myself a tortoise today (thank you Kama) and am darn proud of it. The scale went up and I could not see the meaning of it at all. My shape is wonderful with some tweaking to come, but I can not in good faith complain. Complaining is energy not well spent and no one should have to hear about how I have so few to lose and seem to not be able to get there. ALL IN GOOD TIME….. THE RIGHT TIME. My time. The moment is great.

Happy Earth Day everyone! I tell you, even the numerous pregnant robins outside in the trees look mighty confused as to what is happening with this weather. I think they should huddle up, but they seem content to remain on their own, shivering. Strange. Personally, I would go find some shelter. Well, this is where my mind is at this moment. Thoughtful about birds and Buddyslim. I hope those who are here are doing well and finding creative and healthy ways to enjoy their moments…. For those who are not here and are doing their thing as life does call us to do sometimes, I am thinking about you too.

I heard this on Oprah, but of course have heard it on blogs and in life before, if you want to experience goodness and want others to have goodness, give. Give without wanting. And maybe this Earth can someday experience more bliss then bullshit chaos (Montreal!…for instance). Focusing on the good right now Off to make a multiveggie salad and in a bit some halibut for us…..fresh pineapple for dessert.

This week I really work on feeling each moment instead of blindly walking through this life…..hehe

Stillness speaks
Quiets my soul to keep
Frees me to not think
That’s right, no thinking
Oops, are you thinking?
I know it’s hard to stop
Since the mind is persisting
It seems to continuously
Be fighting and resisting
Precious sacred solitude
The power of presence
Captivating effervescence
Intoxicating aliveness
Invigorating in stillness
An irony that stumps us
In a society that says do
In a culture pressuring you
To always perform and act.
How pleasant it truly is
To withdraw from all that
Sit quietly and meditate
Go within and gravitate
Toward the depths within
Feel the greatness of zen
Let go of your ideological spin
Stop wrestling and feverishly fighting
Experience enlightenment transforming
Happily enter the world of being
As you do the stress is fleeing
The mental confusion melting
The worries and concerns leaving
The burdens of the day dropping
The guilt from yesterday dissolving
The fears of the future fading
Ah yes, now we’re experiencing
The awesome power of presence
The sweet, sublime inner confidence
Experience and feel it from within
By no means is is unattainable or distant
Release the mental fixation with mysterious
Simply be, accepting what is unconditionally
Rejoice fully and dynamically experience
All the inner world and senses have to offer
Freedom to ride the waves like a surfer
Intuitive precision as that of a golfer
The blossoming of consciousness
Like a gorgeous hibiscus flower
Be fully present and forget the hour
Transcend the months and the days
Move beyond the minutes and delays
Simply be in the moment with exuberant praise
Let not yourself, nor your thoughts get in the way
For stillness is contemplative and enlightening today

How is this weight related? *writes this as a reminder to myself* Well if we just take a moment to breathe, without going into the kitchen when we are experiencing anxiety or boredom, then we realize that it is okay to be with the anxiousness and the boredom for awhile. Difficult at first, but better for us in the long run. I have experienced both and the stillness is much better for all reasons. Let it all go, be still and then there really is no need to eat with our emotions. It just takes practice and I will not be asking perfection of myself. Tea cheers!

Well I have been doing well. Not super strict either. I am enjoying treating my body well. Nice to have a break and give my screaming bowling butt a break.

What was really strange was that I had a bit of an anxious day as I was reading yesterday. Just old thoughts in the pursuit of becoming my best me. Well David wanted to go out for a treat and I could not think what I wanted. Really, THIS is not like me at all. I just did not want. Could not think of anything. Well, we opted for an ice cream place where I had chocolate and blood orange sorbet. Yes 2 flavors. I love the taste experience….lol But it was dairy free and next time I would just get one flavor… chocolate, but I learned something. I was not eating out of stress. Not an ideal day, but I was not thinking of food to solve anything or comfort me. Heck it was not even my idea to have a treat. But because I had left some extra points for a dessert (I assumed fruit because this is all we had) it was no big deal. I went over my points only by one (25 pt day) and it was all good. It was good to give my strained muscle a bit of a break, do some reading and go out for a treat with my sweetie. What was stressful? Triggers and little arguments! I guess we just butt heads sometimes, like once a month. I know it is often because I do not express what I want to do. I just go along and then perhaps resentment builds. Ahhh learning….

Have not been getting my veggies as much as I would like, but all stocked up now. I had a high protein day (it has been a high intensity month for exercise) so having a little sugar was fine…. just not making it a habit.

What do you call a serving a fruit of vegetables???

I say a half a banana, a good half cup of grapes, a medium carrot, stuffed cup of spinach, half cup of real juice, stuffed or heaping half cup of broccoli are all a serving for me. I have been getting 6ish and I want 8-12. So, it should be better now that we went shopping. Goal is to replace one snack with veggies instead of, well other choices. I know I could have looked up what the Canadian or American health organizations call a serving, but just curious what others eat for veggies.

Since I am really becoming aware of my chewing, I feel content with just smaller portions and less food generally and this includes veggies. But I have energy and feel good. SO I guess this is most important.

Looked at my goals and I am doing all right! Off to work out and study.

Weighing in Monday…… it is about time ! Ha!

Have a great day everyone. Feed yourself like you deserve to be fed, exercise your precious body and laugh. I am making a choice to laugh at the insanity!!! *hugs*

P.S.: Love this blog and had to share!

http://jenndombroski.buddyslim.com/2008/04/15/an-orange-vs-chocolate/

LOVE Buddyslim and all the cool minds out there.

Had a great day of being on plan and I am going to bed with 24 points under my belt and this is my target number.  No eating after supper and it feels good.  I kept active today and tomorrow is a full book/study day.  No client.  No laundry.   Maybe minimal cooking.  No pressure.  Taking the day off from working out… my first out of 15 days… I think it is needed.  Study, study, study…….  Today was a little overwhelming in that it felt like I was just not getting enough done which was just a matter of poor perspective.  All is well.  Have a great night.

Little by little….. for me.  Respect and a little dedication feels so darn fine!

Arthritis friendly foods…..

from the Food Medicine Book (actually I found this in a forum that I stumbled upon… blah I detest food forums…..lol, I mean the ones where the radicals hang out…. often vegetarian and mad. If anyone knows of a nice vegetarian forum, one with good info. please share if you could. Thanks. Would be so helpful.

….Friendly…..umeboshi plums, sprouts, sea vegetables, herbs, flaxseed oil,avocado, olive oil, green tea, chlorophyll, macadamias, tumeric, alfalfa, spelt, soy, cabbage, beetroot, celery, shallots, chives, foods high in calcium (NO CLUE what umeboshi plums are and I do not like macadamia nuts… find them blah. Hmmm……)

foods to avoid
animal fats- including dairy and red and white meat, processed wheat, processed and refined oils, coffee, alcohol, refined sugar, garlic, hot spices, the night shade family of vegetables, citrus fruits, excess salt, rhubarb, cranberry, plums, silverbeet (I knew citrus was bad but I love it. Same with anything tomato! Moderation I suspect! I KNOW people who are ingesting cranberry by the buckets in order to relieve symptoms of arthritis….)

Just thought I would share. As much for me as for all who care. Love ya. Have a great day!

I have made some very poor choices and I just can not take it anymore. I felt so aweful. Yesterday I learned that JUNK= anxiety, bloatedness, general crumbiness and then after this crappy day I felt like I could not get to sleep. SO what is today like? Well I already know that a nap is scheduled for me when ever I need, because I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE THIS SPIRAL INTO AN ILLNESS. I let stress get to me and this is such a poor excuse, but I did. I guess I have never felt like I hated junk foods (brownies, dairy, bread….. that was about it, but just YUCK. Not agreeing with me, SO I NEED TO LISTEN TO THE FEEDBACK!), but I dislike them in me. So what is it going to take for me to not turn to this crap? Do I need to become diseased? I really hope not. My plan which is what I am working on for a lifestyle is starting today. It is not tough for me only because I have eaten like this for a long time, but the key is to maintain it. I need to get cleansed. I researched the many recipes out there and to be honest they may not be for me. I have low blood pressure as it is and I do not need to be falling down with a lack of calories and ancient remedies that say they revive a toxic liver. I just am going to eat well and exercise. Not so hard. For my stress, I am getting back to reading my book, A New Earth. I was dealing so well with all of life’s stresses and then I put it down while I worked on other priorities. Well that was just poor for my self growth. I am opening my mind again to a deeper existence. One where perhaps I will think, breathe and let it all go instead of ingesting sugars and fats, only to feel ill in the end.

No more floundering….. Time for a life long plan that will work for me, I know, because I when I have done it, I have felt the best I have ever felt! But, I am SERIOUSLY starting to realize that the treats do not even feel so nice inside. There is not even the same pleasure in the moment. Just overly sugary waste!

The plan is to be on plan for 6 out of 7 days. No if’s, and’s or but’s about it! On my “off” day, I am not truly off, but I can have a meal, plus a small treat (IF SO DESIRED). But if I chose to eat out, the food I pick will still not be the problem foods for awhile. There is a lovely East Indian restaurant where I can have some nice vegetarian, dairy and bread free foods that are to die for. Other options exist. Love Mexican! Not every meal can be “off” plan on this day or I will seriously feel crappy. But, it will be there if I want. For 6 days I feed myself well. Heal. Become energized and feel like my body is alive, instead of feeling irritated.

I am thinking RAW and will lightly steam the tough vegetables for good digestion.

WHOLE FOODS. Are brown rice cakes whole? I think not, but then there is some common sense allotted here.

Decent food combining most of the time. No meat with complex carbs. Good solid vegetarian food combining for energy and protein. Fruits alone and not within 4 hours or so after protein. Pineapple and papaya are the exceptions if so desired.

Chew food well, 20-50 times depending of course on the food.

NO SUGAR, FLOUR, BREAD WHEAT PRODUCTS, CAFFEINE OF ANY KIND for a good damn long time.

NO DAIRY, except yogurt.

8-12 servings of fruits and veggies per day.

A little good healthy fat, my omegas

30-50 grams of fiber per day. Not actually going to keep track long term, but for a few days just to get a feel for what is good. I know I need a lot. (Beans, lentils, chickpeas, fruit, vegetables, psyllium, grains…) I had no flatulence when I was eating well. It only came back when I started to eat junk. Even eating all the legumes, NOTHING. Cool! One of my faves is beans in tomato sauce and it does have added sugar, that is one of the worst. Nasty! T.M.I….lol But like you weren’t thinking it!

Continue to drink my water and herbal teas between meals as to not dilute my stomach juices when I eat. Sips of course are fine, but no diluting.

Vitamins.

Appreciate and give thanks for all that I have.

Back to a happy me….. I really did need to feel rotten to get back to a more relaxed and healthier way of living. Eating well is not a strain! I do not want dead and deadening food in me. I do not want toxins floundering in my blood doing damage and this is what sugary junk foods and chemicals do….. they overwhelm our organs like our Liver and then all systems do not do as well as they could otherwise. For instance, our metabolism can slow down when our Liver becomes sluggish. I want a healthy metabolism. I want a healthy me. I deserve to be healthy, despite what my screwed up ego of a mind tells me sometimes.

Wow…. RELIEF. I do not feel sad or frustrated. I just needed to feel and know where I want to be. My body yelled and I will respect this.

Next section in my course…. Optimal Nutrition for the Mind. Looks great and I am excited to start it. I love it when statements are backed up with really good studies and I feel really confident with the contents…. from just doing a quick overview of it.

Bowling yesterday was GREAT. I mean I was awful! Plum awful. I have not bowled since I was 10 years old, but it was good. So much fun. But I noticed with all the sugar I had before we went out (EE for completely stupid reasons), I really felt anxious. Still good times and I can not wait to go again. I swear I used different muscles then when I play the Wii and it really was, well a good workout. The shoes fit nice too. Almost wanted to take them home…lol

Have a great weekend everyone. Hope it is sunny where you are. Looks amazing here so I am going to make myself a fresh juice, start a crockpot of slow simmering vegetable soup/broth and enjoy the day…. outside, with a book, tidying a little. Might go play mini golf. David seems to think that I would get a rush out of doing some target practice. Good lord, either he knows me too well or I do not know me at all. We will see what adventures we can find. I am opting for mini golf, but I am into stepping outside my box these days, like a younger me would have done …… I may give almost anything a whirl! *smiles* Have a great one!