Jenn

So the last food hit my lips at 7:45 which is too late to be eating for me, but life happens.  Teeth are brushed and flossed and I am sipping on my decaf green tea.

Did my tea inventory because I want to get back to replacing the careless snacking with a variety of teas.  I have indulged the last couple days and the cravings are not evil.  The moody beast just must have her days too.  They are not even regrettable.  That kind of thinking is what I am trying to avoid.

TEAS to choose from:

Matcha Tea - NEW today

Green Sencha tea

Green tea Goji Berry

Tetley decaf Green tea

Decaf Earl Grey

Lavender Earl Grey

Vanilla Earl Grey

Cream Earl Grey tea

White tea

Organic White Chai tea

Ayurvedic Herbal Infusion Woman’s tea

Kama Sutra Chai tea

Decaf Green tea

Peppermint tea

Ginger tea

Chamomile tea

Cherry tea

Red Rose black tea

Rooibos tea

Tea cheers to me and you.

Today I loved chocolate SO MUCH.  Off to work out a little.

Might do a little check in most nights to be accountable. (inspired by a buddy)  I am pleasant and so much happier when I am seeing improvements.

Oh and I picked up Carmen Electra’s DVD for fun.  I love that it is low impact!! (also inspired by a buddy who loves it)

Sweet dreams to all. 

The journaling has been good. But what I am most impressed with is how my mind has calmed a little. I have been really anxious about the whole dieting mentality and hence this has lead me to open my eyes to new things (The Book, the only book, Intuitive Eating and the Joy of Silence). I am often racked with all kinds of hormones this time of the month, but this time when I wanted salt and chocolate I went with it. BUT I AM EATING WITH TRUE AWARENESS AND ACCEPTANCE. It is not the irresponsible eating that we call binge eating. Rather it is healthier view of food and myself where I did not judge the food or try to hide myself. Truly my emotions change like the wind, but this moment has been coming. Anything worth having comes with a preliminary hell. I will keep doing what I know is correct for my form and for my mind. That which is Beyond me is a comfort because I do not need to know the plan. I just need to do what I know is True. These are the challenges I face. I know I have to do things and change is always scary.

My goal this week is to NOT hide behind food or use food to cause me to feel like a failure. This week I feel Everything. I have learned so much about myself by being present with the Silence and the emotions of loneliness and I could not have asked for a better teacher then the stillness of the moment. Also, I need to get my own copy of Intuitive Eating so I can mark it up.

I really enjoyed watching all the Olympics this weekend. There is a quality with in each athlete that is truly magical. Just one example, but watching that woman from Romania (Constantina Tomescu-Dita) just run and run and press on and on was truly inspiring. How is it that some have that drive and others just do not? Not everyone has great roots to inspire this strength, so what is it? Where does this belief in oneself come from? How does one become a believer in oneself? Just some thoughts I am having right now……..

Ok, my stomach is telling me it is breakfast time….

Before I go, the scale says a gain, but this is so far from the truth. GEORGE! My body is so different and this is due to exercise….walking and strength training. I am so thankful for all that my body does. I will do my best to respect it so that it might continue to provide me with this much loved movement. I am sending out a big thank you to my physical body! *THANK YOU*

Have a great week everyone! I will be back next Sunday. (I have updated my profile too.)

So I want to write something quick and yet do not know what to say. It feels like I am just now talking to a new friend I have not seen in awhile. What to say?

I have been frustrated and I do not want sympathy, please! But just wanted to share that I injured my knee again, same thing and they will not do anything for it, they can’t they say. SO I NEED TO BE CAREFUL! No I was not even doing a sport, I was climbing up one very high step of a bleacher to watch a baseball game and just twisted it wrong. Not only that, instead of resting it properly I went a little hard with life when I should have just sat on my butt for awhile. So yesterday was a sit on my butt day drugged out on some most pleasant medication that actually helped me to keep my behind glued to the couch and bed. Seriously I felt drunk for much of the day. It feels so much better today. BUT I KNOW I MUST BE CAREFUL.

I have had some other health issues that have lead me to need to do a bit of a cleanse. Nasty cravings!! I am using food and as much activity as I can to cleanse/detox and get better. One way to really detox is to sweat a lot and work the big muscles (I can not work my quads…. *tear, tear*). Well since I am trying to take it easy with any kind of impact, this is tough. I am looking to the Wildcat activity chart and giving it my all, with in reason. Seriously I have been slacking and it is time to work on my strength and flexibility a little. Could I have re-injured myself because I have let certain activities fall from my routine? Perhaps. Could be just an old injury (my Mom has the same thing I just found out - weird!). Matters not now. Now it is time to get at it and make it better.

Study, workout, read blogs at lunch time, study and go to book club tonight. Missed Canadian Idol last night. Yes I am watching it and loving it like the older gal I am. I hear from some young people that it is so yesterday……lol Well I guess I never use to watch it, but now it is a part of my week. I should be able to see it soon. *grins*

So have a great week everyone! It is time for a loss

I have received some good words from some buddies and no I am not going to be hard on myself, but truly I have really taken a few steps backwards. I do not know why. I do not feel sad, but it is time to get real. Am I mad? Perhaps a little. Am I ready to eat proper small meals often and exercise regularly? Yes. YES I AM.

I have recently started a new section where I am reading what I already believe in my heart - healing and maintaining health is so much in our capabilities. There are so often negative energies present in our bodies that deter us from being well in our minds and bodies. Illness is manifested so often as a result of negativity whether it be our thoughts about ourselves, stress or other toxins. I have to do better. I need to deal with out food. Boredom, sadness, fear….. Food is not the answer.
There is none of this past sadness about not being at goal or not being better then I have been. The time to start is always now.

So what are my little steps for the next 3 days?

-No eating at night.

-workout early-before work/studying, some kind of activity at night (something light so I do not feel energized when I need to sleep)

-eating well and balanced

Simple.

Now.

I think this little cutey lost her tail? Well that is sort of how I feel sometimes. Just not quite complete.  But I am getting back to it. Just like that. Little by little……

Have a great night Everyone! We are all worth it and WE ALL CAN DO IT.

So, how do people who do Weight Watchers handle the OOPS I WENT OVER MY POINTS THIS WEEKEND.  I have to say I like starting on a Friday, because then you can indulge, BUT THEN you must get back on track and start your week like you want to get something accomplished.   Still I did over indulge a tad.  No, no chastising!  Just good workouts that will continue through out the week.

I indulged on the dairy, fries (?wtf?) and cookies.  But then I also worked out something fabulous on Friday and Saturday and then went a bit lighter on Sunday.  So, I am human.  I never eat fries anymore . I just do not want, but I did crave and did not resist - I ENJOYED.  Could have eaten the last few slower or stopped though, that would have been lady like…LOL  Anyways, I wish you all a great week.  And I will use my 25 each day, like a lady and not a wolf.

Respecting me and the oh so smaller stomach I have.  I think I kind of know what it must feel like for those who have gastric bypass surgery and then have an ounce to much food.  Wow.  Feel the fullness and stop, OH YEH!  Thin people stop eating when full.  Good tip!  *remember THIS as one of my goals*

Hugs to you, hugs to me…….. and a better and better we will be……  Grief, must stop now. 

I watched the French Open today (7AM) and I absolutely love Rafael Nadal (won in 3 straight sets), but also I really think Roger Federer is one of a kind and a terrific human being. Nadal is so hot! Anyways sometimes winning when there is not much of a challenge is not always the ideal. A challenge where you have to really really work at things is so much better and I hear rewarding.

Every time I have a not so fine day for my intake I realize now that it is just one day. I am tracking my points for a while because it is in me to test myself and show a little discipline and moderation. The best thing I did Friday was to decide to track my points. So after 2 days my extra points are gone! Ha! Twas a terrific weekend in all ways. Played Twister, did some shopping, did some reading (no studying), walked to the movies in the rain with my sweetie (Indiana Jones), watched Sex in the City (the series) watched and listened to the rain, made some amazing cookies (small batches are good!) and relaxed. Oh yeh and on the day where I used up the majority of my extra points, I had a terrific workout day of intense cardio and strength training (9 points of exercise). I woke up feeling amazing!

So the next 5 days I will be consuming 25 points per day. Life is good. I just require light boundaries sometimes. There is a type of personality that works well with WW and these type programs. There is no denial, but you do have to use your head a little. It is so nice to say “no thank you” with confidence then to accept and eat something mindlessly. A good place….

So why Twister? I had to play it after Jon Bon Jovi was a guest in Sex in the City and was playing it with Sarah Jessica Parker. Of course they collapsed on each other and yadda yadda…. Note to self, no playing Twister when I do Hard Body Yoga the day before and I do not stretch before the game because twisting myself up like a pretzel is scary stuff - felt like I may scream with the pain of holding those positions….hehe Fun times! What a masicist I am!

Ahh…. Have a great day and week Everyone. Simple… eat healthy or healthier and move more, for us! I will try and do my best

Woke up FAMISHED and so I listened to my body and fed it what it wanted and I assume needed.  Eggs/egg whites and whole wheat sprouted grain bread.  It is nearing the grouchy emotional time and I feel I just need to not deny myself what my body most likely needs.  NO I DO NOT NEED all the countless junk cravings, but I sure did need those eggs today.  Funny how such a healthy food could be seen as a treat this AM.  But I just have not wanted them until today.

I had such a distaste and then a full-out desire, what is up with this?  Listen, learn, experience, learn some more….. Love.  Not doing enough loving of myself today.  Need to believe in me and trust.  My mantra…. I am good enough when I am just being true to me.

Off to do yoga and study….

Wishing you all a great day. 

I have to say first off, it is COLD here. Forget about the actual number, the wind is so nasty! Ok. Dealing with this. These reporters from one of the news stations comes up to me the other day and asks me if it is going to storm. I thought he was nuts. So my remark was basicaly whatever, whatever, all will be good. Well the joints are feeling it today. Burrr! The sun shows it’s face and thank goodness for this.

So, we have been eating out a lot, not such bad choices actually, but back to the basics this week. And the poem works. Most of the time just letting the cravings and wanting pass really works. But I thought of something else that worked for me today when I was just wanting for a moment. Over the weekend I heard a story about how there will not be enough food for many countries and this got me thinking about my consumption. How can I eat in such excess when others have none or so little? Clearly my days food does not affect a child elsewhere, but it did change how I was thinking. Not guilt. Just a realization of what I need, what is good for me and what is just shear habit, poor habits.

So, I am thinking food combining is not so bad when I do it most of the time and still allow for some treat type foods. I am eating moderately and exercising moderately as well. I call myself a tortoise today (thank you Kama) and am darn proud of it. The scale went up and I could not see the meaning of it at all. My shape is wonderful with some tweaking to come, but I can not in good faith complain. Complaining is energy not well spent and no one should have to hear about how I have so few to lose and seem to not be able to get there. ALL IN GOOD TIME….. THE RIGHT TIME. My time. The moment is great.

Happy Earth Day everyone! I tell you, even the numerous pregnant robins outside in the trees look mighty confused as to what is happening with this weather. I think they should huddle up, but they seem content to remain on their own, shivering. Strange. Personally, I would go find some shelter. Well, this is where my mind is at this moment. Thoughtful about birds and Buddyslim. I hope those who are here are doing well and finding creative and healthy ways to enjoy their moments…. For those who are not here and are doing their thing as life does call us to do sometimes, I am thinking about you too.

I heard this on Oprah, but of course have heard it on blogs and in life before, if you want to experience goodness and want others to have goodness, give. Give without wanting. And maybe this Earth can someday experience more bliss then bullshit chaos (Montreal!…for instance). Focusing on the good right now Off to make a multiveggie salad and in a bit some halibut for us…..fresh pineapple for dessert.

This week I really work on feeling each moment instead of blindly walking through this life…..hehe

I think I am easing up on the food combining thing. I NEED protein and carbs sometimes especially when I am really active and working out. I simply can not go on natural sugars alone or plain protein. I NEED ENERGY! Though I think it did wonders for my digestive system, it is not a long term solution I mean if I was sitting down doing basically nothing, I could function with isolated carbs, fats and proteins. But it is simply not realistic for me. Enough. So I asked Dr. Marc for some advice and I greatly appreciated it. I am really going to work at this diet plan which is basically like Marge’s. It is a smart diet that I believe is just good eating. Yah… no more cravings.

Rheumatoid arthritis friendly diet: Omega 3s (I take 3-6-9), fruits and veggies, legumes, no white anything or anything processed, easy on the complex carbs with the high calorie content, avoid dairy and meats, except fish, no dairy …… yikes, he had me up until NO DAIRY. But I actually know that he is right. Thank you Dr. Marc.

Back to the forum for me….. thank you Lori for the challenge. Let’s get ripped!!!

Did not weigh in and I did use the mirror to assess….. oh yeh it is going to be a great month!  Get ripped 3 times per week and various activities in between.  Spring …..summer….. shorts and maybe a new swimsuit, assuming I want one to stay on me… I need a new one.   Here I go ! ! !

Have a great week everyone!  *hugs*

A different approach to dieting, this is what I am taking. No points and a couple times I wanted that scale and 2x I stepped on it. Nasty validation and it proved NOTHING! But still 2x is much improvement over the past normal times I would get on that little beast. Lena called her fridge the beast, well the scale is a different kind of beast. Anyways. The beast tells me good things this AM. I am down a couple pounds and that is reasonable and surprising too. I know I ate more food then usual but I TRIED to keep things portioned. I am going to do the same thing this week. JUST LIVE and not worry so much! By my old assessments of things I would have said this was a bad week, but it was fine. I upped my activity when I needed to and for the most part did not think about my journal or points. If anything the closer I got to today, I did think twice about eating at night. Since I have been eating as much as I felt was a good amount to just feel satisfied, I have not been hungry at night. Sure I ate sometimes just out of a desire to have a little something, but it was all fine and good. ONLY one night did we eat fast food and that was the strangest night for dreams…..lol Again, balance. I worked out pretty consistently, but I also had the last 2 days off from my workouts. I am back at it today, but I think I needed a breather from the thoughts of weight loss (good advice from a buddy) and indeed, today I do feel so much more refreshed.

NO SCALE until next Sunday. I am putting my foot down, but not on the scale !!!

Keeping things healthy! And of course allowing for my treats. And there are some good choices out there that still feel slightly indulgent.

But this is my relationship with food. When I am good in my mind, food is a breeze. When I am stressed with life or people, all of the not so good foods and huge portions seem intriguing and almost beyond my will power. This week I challenge myself to take as many emotional moments as possible (let there be as few as possible, please *prays*) and just deal better. Maybe this means exercising or taking a little walk, or maybe it means choosing some healthier carbs (the mind and body likes these in stressful times) with protein to settle myself. Having something to eat does not have to be the beginning of a huge binge. Even if it is just a little, it does not have to spiral. I have thought about this, the harder I try not to sometimes it just makes me want more, so why not think that it is okay to have a medium sized bowl (a good cup) of cereal (lots of cinnamon, little protein, both of which will slow those sugars up and ease them into the bloodstream). One time this week I realized when I allowed myself to have something when I was stressed, I DID NOT EVEN WANT IT. If I had said, no that is not what a good dieter does (lol), then I would have wanted it, LIKE ALWAYS. So, this is how I work. GOOD TO KNOW!!! *rolls eyes*

With patience and some commitments all will be exactly how they should be.

I hope that everyone is having a super weekend and is ready to start off a great week. My thoughts and prayers do go out to all who are struggling, especially those who are struggling with health problems or the not knowing and waiting. Hugs to you all.

Tea cheers (Organic White Chai Tea this morning….. )

I realize this blog is very hard to read.  I always see the converse of things, so my apologies for the insides of my head only at this time.  Back and forth…. tis my way to demonstrate BALANCE.  :)  Who knew that I could find balance in some confusion