Jennifer

That is the number to lose to reach my mini goal.  And this could be my goal, I am not sure.  But how hard can 16 pounds be???

Ticker is adjusted.

I am trying to work Weight Watchers (24-30 pts) and Intuitive Eating.  Ahh just a little like opposites… Also easy on the treats.  My ass and my mind are not loving the sugar!

Trying to be more consistant with the activity.

Emotions!  What the hell can I say about this?  May have to ask a friend about some techniques she has found helpful.  It is time to start talking I think.  I can not do it by myself anymore.

Monday is my weigh in until I decide that is the stupidest day to weigh in.  lol  Once a week has GOT to be better than numerous times a week.

Also: waist-33inches, hip-43inches and thigh-25inches (George will be arriving soon….explaining some excess in inches and emotions.)

Question that I will answer Monday when I weigh in:  What did I do to be accountable to myself and for myself???

 So Ms Jenny McCarthy has inspired me to rethink more commitments for my 30 days.  Well it was not JUST her. See, my consumption of chocolate in the last week has been at an all time high.  I know the weight of the dark Hershey chocolate chip bag and in secret I ate one and bought another because I felt so naughty.  When you put your plastics in the recycling bag, they are NOT easily forgotten, like in the past when I just put them into the garbage.  This new lifestyle of recycling is good in many ways - no lying or “forgetting” allowed.  Like buying another bag of chips would actually last, NO of course not.  Plus we indulged in more chocolate last night.  My god!   So, after reading Jenny’s blog (see Oprah.com)  about how she is challenging herself with no eating after 7PM and no sugar for JUST 30 days, I too am making some neccessary changes.

I am eating before 7PM.  Last night stretched to 7:30 and the night before was 8:00ish.  So no more of this.  Still it was my meals, no snacking after, but still.  8:00 is too late for me.  I have been successful for 5 official nights now.  *Pats self on back*  (Will feed true hunger with reasonable food as to not stress myself.  Just NO MINDLESS eating.)

I am eating sugar/sweetener-free.  YIKES, hey?  This is the biggest thing for me.  This and chocolate have become a little addiction lately.  I say one tablespoon of my Mom’s strawberry jam but no it is double and a little more.  This will mean virtually nothing processed and that is just fine with me. Not eating at night has been a breeze, I am going to feel this missing in my life for awhile but I know I will be better for it.

I am also eating a chemical/additive-free diet.  I am not going to preach about this badness.  I know it is crap and this is for me.  When I grabbed an antihistamine the other night because I was so uncomfortable, that was shocking.  But you can be damn sure I will be not eating the crap that made me feel so awful in the first place, well for 30 days for sure!

Seriously if my Mother bitches about her seasonal allergies again I may snap on her ass too (see I kind of snapped on MY ass/self..lol).  She smokes and then proceeds to blame everything outside of her own actions.  *shakes head*  WHY DO WE DO THIS TO OURSELVES???  What ever, me thinking about the past chocolate and sugar binges is not productive.  Some professionals think it may not even be helpful to figure out why we eat/behave as we do.  The most productive thing might be to actually retrain ourselves with new behaviors.  No more over thinking things.  It is unproductive in a world and big brain that may be beyond understanding.  Much less stressful to just chose to make new choices and do so in a supporting environment.  So this is what the 30 day challenge is about….retraining.

What I have learned in my studies….. It is natural to have cravings if one is not getting the proper balance of nutrients.  Like if one eats a higher protein diet (and I have been doing this to deal with some hypothyroid-like symptoms and things are improving and the weight is coming off little by little) one will need NEED more water and will desire more sugar (carbs).   (Also people will NEED more calcium.  This is why those with a low fat vegetarian diet do not require as much calcium as those who eat high fat dairy, meat and sugar diet.) And because the body really wants it instantly, it will often want the simple sugar and not necessarily the bread or the pasta.  Hmmm…. I think I experienced this.  Only I am not a child and with this challenge, I have to be aware and eat the little more healthy carbohydrates in balance.  Because seriously sugars are prime feedings for disease/cancer.  God and I know this too.  Well, cheers to changes.  There is no stress because it is 30 days, but I would like to develop healthier choices.  That is the goal-Life long health and weight loss.

The thing that is keeping my moods (well some moodiness with the sugar! duh!) in check and helping to create my past shapely legs, OF COURSE the exercise!  Not eating at night is helpful because I am sleeping better too and there is less slow moving food in my gutt.   All good things.  Especially the Hard Body Yoga.  I think my legs MUST be looking FINE.  David has said he would like to try!  I told him when he does it to take it easy the first time.  I am so excited to have an exercise partner, maybe, hopefully…..hehe.

So I am losing weight slowly.  But the scale is nearly dead and my computer is DEAD.  I posted that it was slowly taking a downward turn (shutting off when ever it wanted) well, it is DEAD.  So, it will be awhile before I have a new one.  I am using my sweetie’s and truly it feels like a beast compared to my laptop…lol  Anyways I am thankful for the use.  But I will be on the computer less for awhile.

If I should faulter a little with my 3 personal challenges I WILL let ya know.  Here I am, honest with me (YAH!) and I will also be honest with you.  Buddyslim is a part of my life.  I just have to use it affectively.  ;)  I will be posting a new picture at the beginning of summer along with my ticker.  The old ticker has been out of commision but it WILL be back then.  When my metabolism slowed, so did my spirit.   But I am happy to say, both are soaring.  Well it just seems good to see some slight visual changes.  I will take this ride on the turtle ANY DAY !

The freedom from the mindless night time eating…..

For the kind of dieter that I am, I MUST relax equally as much as I think about all this craziness.  Key: Stay commited to a couple important things, but relax too.  So far, things are great and I see this becoming a nice little life syle.  I REALLY have not been missing the eating at night at all.  In fact, I like the clean teeth feeling and the ever so empty feeling (very good for my past poor digestion).  I will be sitting and watching a program on TV, maybe even a hockey game (Go Washington, GO!) and I love the freedom from the “one snack, ok, maybe two snacks is okay.  Well the heck, why not one more.”  None of this and it’s wonderful! 

So this and exercise have been helping me to feel strong and healthier.  So, why am I a little nervous?  Well it is the weekend and WHO DOESN’T eat on the weekend nights?  Tonight I am going to a Bath Goddess party and that should be free of snacks, but then there is Saturday night.  No clue what is up, but I want this for me!  Not because of anything other then I want to prove to myself that I can commit to something and be good with it.  A little weight loss would be heavenly too.  SO, I need a little motivation…..hehe

My dear Bif Naked is CANCER FREE (yes she kicked it in the ass big time) and she has a CD coming out this coming week. 

SO my gift to myself for not eating after supper on this first weekend is that I get to buy her new CD on THE DAY it is released.  Other wise I have to wait a week.  Well, this is suddenly easy.  I want the CD!  Also, this summer she’s performing a concert here in Saskatoon, so I desperately need pants or something to go with any number of my tops.  So, my reward for going 30 days with no night time eating after supper (remembering that feeding true hunger is healthy and essential…just a little the curb the real hunger - this is ok) is of course new pants.  Yah!  What if I eat within the 30?  Well I need pants…..and I am pretty sure no one wants to see me naked.  Ok, will cross this bridge when it comes.  It’s mostly all words.  I am going to do my best and the pants will be mine.  But will I have the bragging rights to say I did it?  I WANT THIS !!!

Yah, yah the the motivation should be internal, but I want to make this fun.  No reprimands or feeling bad at any time.  But I do need to stay commited and this requires a little thought.  The fact that my attitude is so great these days is another little reward. 

I feel physically strong and motivated.  And this head of mine is pleasantly on the right way, so that is an added bonus.  

*hugs*

Yes the doctor told me last year that my thyroid is fine, but my symptoms would say differently.  With a slight weight gain over the past year (15ish pounds…because I did not give up completely) and feeling as I have, I know enough to know I do not want to go back to that place.  And I saw a hint of those same symptoms reappearing only this time I am much more knowledable/intuned. 

We hear so often that eating more is often the key.  But individuals are unique and so a few will have to eat only a little if they have a health issue and a professional has suggested it, but if one is eating too low (like maybe I did, aiming for what WW suggested as around 24-26 pts for years :about 1300-1400 calories), well this can be asking for problems, unknowingly of course.  I think it goes back to the old addage…”slow and steady wins the race.”  For me, slow and steady represents what is good and healthy in reality and the race represents our minds and how we think we should get there faster then we really should.  The fast weight loss truly is not something, I have seen with myself and some buddies, that can be maintained.   I really have been here for a long time and this is what I have witnessed of many and myself.  Slower really is the best answer for many of us.  It is a nasty feeling to lose, get to goal and then gain.  And why we ask?  But so often it is not the choices we make (though it is easy to slip back into the old junky habits, true) but rather it is a metabolism that revolts a bit. 

http://thyroid.about.com/cs/dietweightloss/a/eatingenough.htm

There is an equation in this link that is just awesome!  Maybe….lol  Here it is:

Current Weight, in Pounds _____
Divide above by 2.2 _____
Multiply result by 25 _____ (For a person w/ a normal thyroid, multiply by 30)
Subtract 200 for “Thyroid Factor” -200 (-500 to lose 1 lb/wk for those who have a normal thyroid)
Calories Per Day for Weight Loss _____
Divide by 300 = # of 300-calorie “mini-meals” Per Day _____

And of course plenty of exercise. 

I am also curious how age plays into this.  Also how does this affect one who is really obese or inactive?  I have no idea.

I will update when it has been a suffiecient amount of time to really tell.

I am estimating my calories for each of the 6 meals per day as I can NOT quite get into the lifestyle of keeping track of the caloires.  I know I am aiming for about 300 calories/meal which seems like a lot for snacks…lol  :)  - but it really isn’t when keeping active.  Intuitive Eating will play a role, because I do not see myself stuffing myself to meet the 300 goal.  If I am full, I will stop.  And if I am not hungry, I will not eat.  And what to eat and what to avoid is actually ingrained and natural to my thinking…a more hypothyroid type diet mostly.  Thank god I feel patient.  If I was learning this all at once, I might go insane.  Nope, no insanity here.  I am giving it a whirl.  I do not care if I lose 2 lbs per month.  If fact, for myself, this might be the healthiest speed.  Plenty of exercise of course too.  Time will tell. I feel happy, motivated and healthy.  Now, off to work out. Happy Easter Weekend…..Have a great day Everyone!

Buddyslim Politics.  Does it seem crazy OR is it a glitch that some blogs remain at the top of the list while others, new buddies especially who are wishing for sincere support, get placed at the bottom of the list?  All because in the options setting you can change the time so that one’s blog stays high?  Why?   I think it only fair that when a blog is posted that it goes to the top of the list.  This should not be a place that represents popularity, but rather should be a place that encourages weight loss support for those who need it.  If this is a concern of yours, please do NOT comment on this blog about this.  It is not affective.  Please write Dr. Marc an email with your concerns if you have any.  

My blog usually goes to about the 10th or so position and I did not know why until I read a buddies blog stating how this happens.  I adjusted the numbers for this blog so people would see it and read it.  But my settings are back to normal.  If one could answer a question for me, :) what is the purpose of this setting option?  I did care a lot about the answer, but now, not so so much I guess.    

FEBRUARY !!!  Ohhh-yeh!

So I have been thinking that Change is indeed a fine and wonderful little word.  And when actions support it, well that is just wonderful.  But what do I want for myself?  I have been thinking about how I feel about food.  Normally the only time I want food it is when I am emotional (not really much of this AT ALL *smiles* lately) and obviously when I am hungry.  I have not been craving anything.  I just eat when I am hungry and aim for whole and balanced food.  I like that a lot.  I start to get that feeling of how smaller, non-obsessed people (with food anyways) must feel.  It is so peaceful to imagine that. 

Earlier this week I felt that overwhelming sense of fear with foods and that is something I need to address at least in words because that is not a way I want to live.  But when you feel awful when you eat certain things, or like a buddy suggest, certain combinations, well it kind of makes you wonder about food choices.  I have found peace in the fact that this will be over.  *fingers crossed*  I do have an itsy-bitsy fear that the allergist will say, you are not allergic to anything.  I mean I do not want to have an allergy or sensitivity, but I want an answer to the awful feelings.  So, fear.  Well after a good week I did have a day yesterday where I just fed myself well/a lot and I felt so good.  Asian Curry Chicken, Chicken Salad Rolls (no vermicelli, only veggies and chicken) and Singapore Noodles w/ loads of veggies.  I ate a lot compared to what I have been eating and felt awesome in all ways!!!

 Then I thought to myself, that was such an awesome treat.  No I do not want this every week, but damn.  I do love food!  Eating like this, on whole food/almost no sugar seemed to make me really appreciate it that much more.  I do not even want any more today.  It was that, a damn fine meal.  But now I want the simpler foods.  One thing is for sure, changes are seen in this body and I do not need the scale to reaffirm this. 

When I was 152 after being at buddyslim for a few months and SO CLOSE to my set goal weight at the time, I was so disgusted that my body was not what I had hoped.  But letting the number go and just realising that I have a body to create AND THE NUMBER DOES NOT MATTER and that the process in getting there is kind of fun.  Sculpting a firm and True body is much more important to me then a saggy, baggy number-”perfect” body. 

So, these are the things that I am gently holding in my hand and in my thoughts as I begin this month.  Should I say that knowing that I usually mess things up?  I feel like I can tempt it.  I finally know what I want and it IS attainable.  I think in the past I have had doubts.  Like what if my partner and I do not eat the same things and what if we do not eat out enough to satisfy our desires?  So often, WE know, eating out is just unsatisfying, disappointing….  Well,  I have told him, when I want something, I will have it.  He can have whatever he wants.  Tis the Intuitive way!  :)  But the days of me eating because it is there, well that is reserved for those times when I am a little emotional IF I CHOSE and I will have those times I am nearly positive.  But there is no need to make a bigger deal out of it then it is.  It is one moment and time and it stops when the mind allows it to stop.  Why is this sooooo easy now?  This week when I fed my body the nutrients it needed with out all the added chemicals and sugars to mess with my brain (emotions) and body (health) I felt the peace.  Like no cake or cookie could entice me into feeling any other way.  Health and sanity (and I can feel crazy at times) was the big prize!  Now that was achieving peace in mind, body and spirit.   Before I achieved this state by means of control and now, that toxic way of thinking has been shead.  Back into the soil, it is sure to come forth again.  But in smaller amounts?  I think so.  The fear has gone away in this aspect of my life anyways. 

Nearly all whole and nearly no sugar.  Intuitive Eating is my guide, which means I am the one living this life, uninfluenced by the bloody and perverse advertisements and ideals we too often bow to. 

My body knows best.

The Plan:  All weeks, no less then 5 days and preferably 6 days of activity

First & Third week- Structured - Strength MWF, cardio/walking M-F and whatever

Second & Fouth week-Unstructured - whatever I feel I want to do and I feel my body needs

Have a wonderful day, week and month!  I am not going to be on quite as much, as this is just what my everything in me tells me I need to do.  I think I might be finally on a roll, but I need to not procrastinate. 

My school is creating a national cookbook that is going to help give parents healthy simple recipes for their children and entire family.  SO EXCITING !  But, what do kids like?  I have heard on cooking shows that they do not tend to like things smothered in sauces, but they do like dipping things.  What do your kids like to eat?  Healthy whole food ideas (whole grain bread, pastas, etc. are fine) would be greatly appreciated.   I have ideas, but I think you parents are the experts when it comes to what real foods they will eat.  Thank you so much.

———————————————————————————-

FEBRUARY !!!  Ohhh-yeh!

The Plan:  All weeks, no less then 5 days and preferably 6 days of activity

First & Third week- Structured - Strength MWF, cardio/walking M-F and whatever

Second & Fouth week-Unstructured - whatever I feel I want to do and I feel my body needs

Diet: it is a strange percentage, but it gives an approximation…. 95% sugar free (no articial sweeteners what so ever) and 95% whole foods.  LOL…. it is the only number in my life.  I do not count calories, WW points, I do not get on a scale anymore.  A girl needs a little number once in awhile…. Ha.

———————–

A note on not eating out in January….. we so did not do that.  After 2 weeks we decided to support the economy (yeh that was the reason ) and enjoy some delightful SUSHI… omg, it was SOOOO good.  :)  Oh well, good times.

So, I am taking a bit of time to review Intuitive Eating today because it seems the student has forgotten everything.  Another good book for dieters too the Zen of Eating!

Gentle damnit! Ha.  Seriously though, I have this sweet desire to be kind to myself, but how I think I should look is interferring with this.  At the store yesterday I was drawn to the weight loss pills and thoughts of herbs, but this is not the answer.  Knowing that they are not a long term answer and likely will not work, I still thought about it.  Nope, there will be no cheating or failing.  I am going to do this the right way!

My days are going to start with a workout of some kind and it does not matter what.  I just want my heart raised and I want to work my beautiful muscles.  Buried they may be, but there they are wanting to be my major weight loss initiators.   I considered posing my weight ticker again, but I just do not want to be consumed by this number.  Sure I have a goal, but I do not need to be reminded of it only to feel up or down because of it.  There was a time when it really helped to see it each week.  Well I just do not want to go there.  Today though I weighed in just to know where I am and I was not at all surprised to see my biggest number since being at Buddyslim.  176 is what I saw.  I am not sad or anything, but I do know what got me here. 

Too much imbalance.  Too much World of Warcraft with not enough exercise.  More movement is the key.

I am not seeing foods negatively, but again, I need to add more of the lighter foods and decrease the heavy sweet foods.  I know I have had plenty of animal protein and this slows my digestion.  So, I was lost yesterday as I tried to think, well what path will work best for me?  Weight watchers always comes to mind, but I do not want to start the year doing this.  I share as I have shared here before, this helps so much if you have never thought to look at what you eat.  It is a really good start for those who are new to loosing weight.  But this only reinforces the perfectionism and the negative ideas that I do not need.  But I need structure. I do I do….. lol   So, the plan is to aim for 6-10 points per meal for a maximum of what would be 30 and this is about a 1500 calorie day.  And I am not saying NO EATING AT NIGHT, but I really wish to not eat at night unless it feels like I will have trouble sleeping due to hunger.  Snacking is something I would like to knock-off my routine at night.

There is some comparing I did this Christmas just to keep me from getting frustrated.  One of the ladies in my cousins family who we spent Christmas dinner with made a comment when I said I was so cold.  She said, “maybe you need some body fat.”   Well that is both hilarious and sad.  Hilarious-Well I have plenty and too much for my frame.  This is not the sad part.  The sad part is, I am the littlest female and person in my entire family and also everyone at that dinner.  Yikes!  This makes me sad because I know that excess weight (the kind that makes one obese) means that one and all are at an increased rate for health related ilness.  :(  So I knocked off the craziness that might occur in my head if I were to stay there.  Nope, I came out and found some perspective.  Yes I have some habits to get back to (portions and respecting/loving myself with what is the right amount for me-exercise and diet), but there is no need to get worked up with things.  So I have gained, now it is time to start fresh and find that balance again. 

I want new things for 2009.  I want to feel empowered.

I know the weight loss list, but I should just reinforce it here as it is the last day of the year. 

-to prepare interesting and healthy meals more often then not as to feel satisfied (TOO MANY bowls of cereal when I came back to Saskatoon because I just did not seem to care.  No more of that.)

-plenty of fruits and veggies, balanced eating, keep my protein regular and my animal ptrotein (more fish) to the portion good for my digestion (2-3 oz), water, herbal tea, green tea (decaf and regular), vitamins, limit the sugar  

-workout at least 5 out of 7 days a week.  No less then 45 minutes.  I am only firm with this, because this is what has got me here.  A little poofy, but thank goodness I am keeping the perspective.  Gentle, calm……. and as Bif would say, I” love myself today, not like yesterday, I’m cool, I’m calm, I gonna be okay” ….. hell this is going to be a great year.

-do what ever it takes to find the joy and laugh.  Laugh often.

Wishing everyone a great day.  NOW, I am off to workout out.  Happy New Years Eve everyone.  Have a safe and fun night.

Peace and love…..

(Note:  Learning is good no matter what happens, ideal or not so ideal.  Education is education.  For instance, I learned that mixing chocolate pudding powder, the cook on stove kind, with plain yogurt is tasty.  Just as I thought it would be.  Still, this I had to learn by trying.  Now this does not mean I have to do it again, anytime soon anyways.  *rolls eyes* 

yes, yes, yes….. more whole foods and less sweets…… yes, yes, yes…. *puts that angel back on my shoulder for guidance*  lol)

Four days with the ‘family’

Empty greed and shallow gifts

Alone, now with simple carbs and no desire for good quality food,

I ate a days worth of noodles and spicy Kung Pao sauce in one sitting.

This was my first binge in well over 3 months.

I know if I had just posted the blog that I worte instead of just keeping it as a draft,

I might not have felt so alone.

I just didn’t want to share.

Everything has been fake and I just did not want to be real here.  How crazy is that?

But the noodles were real. 

 So why not write about the other reality?

 Nope, just noodles.

Today is a joyous day, because the only thing real is NOODLES and that is only half bad.

From this day forward,

I am aiming for truthful and honest

as simple as

noodles in sauce.

Noodles do not pretend to be something they are not.

They just are.  No claims.  Some fame.

Entangled.  Nothing else.

Infamous and delightful, real noodles.

I can not believe since I have been home I have eaten chocolates, choptle kettle chips, noodles, cereal and okay, salmon, olives, bananas, yogurt and pickles.  Aiming for balance and portions - AND VEGGIES.  I bought them, but they just have not appealed.  Anywho, getting back on track………

Intuitive Eating all the way.  No points.  I am aiming to get back on track withOUT the shit load of control I am craving.  Gentle, loving, me.

Cheers to my holidays being over.

Cheers to green tea!  Off to enjoy a wonderful and perfect cup of green tea (decaf - it’s 10 at night).

Firstly I will be reading blogs as soon as I can.  And I know there are some ladies I need to go back and read some of your older blogs.  I miss you and I have not forgotten about you.  I have just needed to do some things and refocus and I am one of those people who is really good at multitasking until I am not….lol  So, things are busy this week, but still I can feel myself starting to RELAX.

What has been working for my blues and weight loss?  (And the two do go hand and hand.)

-regular exercise (30 min of cardio/day and I am at 5 consecutive days)

-balanced eating

-reaching out to a friend

-a reduction of stress and stressful situations

-no more exposure to renovating chemicals and materials (paint, drywall and drywall dust, paint thinner, paint stripper, crack filler, tub instalation chemicals and product) - these things do place stress on our bodies and cause a depeletion in vitamins and minerals.  I detest chemicals and so that in itself is added stress.   Could write more about chemicals, BUT NO.  Yah, done with them.

-making sure I have been taking my regular vitamins plus other supplements.  I do not take many supplements as I do see them as medicine.  And St. John’s Wort is seriously helpful for me.  I am not taking the full dose, but do find I am really less anxious and less likely to EE.

-Relaxation and self care (meditation, fall clean up that is not rushed, good comedies, good music, getting a new hair cut today)

-Finding out from any source, that I am not alone in what I am feeling and experiencing

 -I am recording just for 5 days to make sure my nutrition is back on.  It has been all over the place and not a desirable place for weight loss.

-REMEMBERING (this has been tough lately) that a high fiber/phytic acid diet can reduce zinc levels and low zinc levels CAN cause a variety of issues including a decreased immune system and low sex drive (among other issues).  One of my favorite high fiber cereals DOES NOT have added zinc where as others do.  Since adding a little zinc when I was ill and when ever I see that I am having those high fiber foods some what frequently I have been feeling a lot better. ;)  Mostly I am eating zinc rich foods.  I am writing this company to ask them why their cereal does not contain added zinc. One serving contains 8 grams of fiber and eaten semi regularily with a healthy diet also contributing to good, I SAY GOOD *smiles* fiber, could lead to low zinc levels.  It is important to know that the requirement of vitamins and minerals is VERY INDIVIDUAL and the symptomalogy is often a better indicator then blood tests.  My tests showed that everything is fine and yet my health was not fine.  Things are finally better.

And what I can believe is INCREASED SERETONIN.  :) 

Today David and I are going to the Trans Siberian Orchestra and I am feeling like it is Christmas.  Not because of the show, this was David’s pick (I picked the James Blunt concert) but rather it IS ELECTION DAY.   I will enjoy the show!   But this election affects more in this world then Canada’s resent election.  SO as soon as I am home tonight, my eyes will be glued to the TV.  I am so excited!!  Yep, I am a giddy kid.  Let’s go Obama voters!!!  I am cheering on my McCain supporting buddies too especially because you have (a) heart(s) of gold.  Love you all!  *hugs*

So I found a fantastic new show (new to me) and I love that it is only 20 some minutes to watch one episode and yet it is nearly 20 minutes of smiling and laughing and this feels so wonderful.   Increased SEROTONIN !!!

The Big Bang Theory is so fantastic!!!  I laughed my behind off. 

It is early to talk about my experience with St. John’s Wort, but I like it.  I do not take it early in the day because I would feel tired all day.  But I take it minimally and I feel comfortable starting out small.  I sleep so well and wake up refreshed.  I am not constipated at all THANK GOODNESS.  What I have found is that I have had a decreased desire to emotionally eat or eat out of boredom.  I feel more content to just be still.  I was feeling a little OCD before, but I feel good.  It is too bad that it interferes with the birth control pill because it could potentially be helpful for people who experience mild to moderate depression.  It is so awesome to have not cried this weekend and truly, that says something.  It was a good weekend and many things have increase my serotonin.

After my fasting blood test yesterday I was so hungry and I ate and ate yesterday.  Seriously I rarely go 14 hours with out eating.  I kind of felt like I might faint, but did not.  YAH.  I am not judging what I ate or how much, but I did eat a lot and I know this because I felt FULL.  Not sure how many  calories or points and I am good with this.   So I am maintaining and my spirits are good.  Though this week I would like to see some progress (any) because I finally feel a little better.  Energy is not optimum, but still it is time.

Love the new tub and more and more baths with candles……..

Whole grains (brown rice, quinoa, etc.), fish, fruits and vegetables, water, good healthy fats (salmon oil, hemp seeds, flax, nuts and seeds) vitamins, treats in moderation and light-moderate exercise (6/7 days).   David and I have decided no eating out until the end of the week.  No sugary desserts and instead we are chosing fruit.  I know this is not really a principle that Intuitive Eating believes in, but my sweetie suggested it (not me who usually says such things), so I think he has been feeling a bit like he wants to see changes for himself.  It will be good for both of us.   I also will be continuing to respect my full feeling……

Have a wonderful week Buddies!  Chamomile tea cheers.  *clink*